Regarding the Recent Allegations

The Martian Muckraker would like to vehemently deny that we, any of the aliens we represent, or any of our subsidiaries and allies were involved in the four* unidentified aerial objects recently sighted in Earthling atmospheric space. When asked for comment C’therax, Editor and Chief of the Muckraker, calmly stated “WE SWEAR WE DIDN’T DO […]

Aquatic vs Terran Sports

I don’t undertand how three dimensional beings can stand the functionally two dimensional existence land enforces upon them. I confess that I often sleep during their terran sports which are often so . . . flattened from my point of view. Will the dribbler go left . . . or right? Only two options. Not […]

Crisis of Faith

Written by Sp’Rark, Cultural Editor of the Martian Muckraker Nothing shook the religious foundations of Ancient Mars more than the discovery of Earthlings. For generations Martians regarded Mars as an Oasis in an otherwise uninhabited universe. Then scientists started hearing the transmissions from Earth. Two planets, Mars and Earth. Practically sisters. Each oblivious to the […]

Military Standoff Ignited by Space Station Social Media

Students were asked to stay away from the student center of the University of Northern Mars today as several hundred refugees were expected to meet there to receive services from doctors, psychiatrists, religious leaders and immigration experts. By the days’ end every doctor we spoke to looked exhausted and even a little worried. Earlier this […]

The Milky Way’s Master of Horror

When I was younger, my parents always knew I was reading the Craters in the Heart series because whenever I finished one of In’cizor Ironcold’s books all my musical compositions would feel like the soundtrack for a blood-splattered budget flick for a solid two months following. Eventually good ‘ol mum and dad insisted I read […]

Ecological Purity or Tyranny?

F’vrel, a renowned Martian Xenobiologist, has been arrested on Silkweave, home planet of the eight-legged Venomite people. Official records list his crimes as “trafficking invasive species and corrupting the ecosystems of Silkweave.” The arrest was done in traditional Venomite fashion: by completely cocooning the alleged criminal in webbing. Enraged Martian diplomats have arranged for F’vrel […]

Game “Earthlings and Epics” Sparks Galactic Controversy

Gamemaker Cri’tevel is at the center of an interplanetary diplomatic spat after his game “Earthlings and Epics” was used by the Earthling government as an example of “alien contempt for our ways.” “I was not trying to offend,” Cri’tevel said, “Heck, I even based the ability system on an old forgotten Earthling game about dragons. […]

Can You Own A Moon?

Almost every known planet with sentient lifeforms has a legal standard prohibiting the ownership of that world’s moons. Most of these customs are quite ancient, being written before the rise of faster-than-light travel when colonizing a moon was impossible anyway. However, as the cost of trans-galactic vehicles continues to plummet, more and more companies are […]

Martians Abuzz for Interplanetary Composer

Trebbuske Lunaria, or just Trebble as he is known by his millions of adoring fans, is one of the most famous composers in the galaxy. “Buzzardlies [the proper name for Trebble’s species], love music. We value our sense of hearing much, much more than our sense of sight. Music is how we worship, how we […]

Explosion at Centralica Mine

BREAKING NEWS – This will be developed as events unfold! All Time Dates are Milky Way Central Time MW 400:323 Three satellites have exploded off of the mining colony of Centralica Moon, just off of Jupiter. A government ship from the Martian High Council and two ships from the Martian Muckraker have responded. We are amplifying […]